My Little Kiwi
Dick from D.C. tells you about BumZap
BumZap Customer Reviews
The Zing Experience
How do you fully capture a zing to the butthole in words? We're not poets, but here's our best shot.
- A thousand frozen butterflies kissing your forbidden garden
- A glacial euphoria blooming in your volcanic abyss
- A ballet of tingling starlight pirouetting in your shadow realm
You can take our word for it, but we prefer to let our customers speak for themselves. We've collected customer testimonials that we're excited to share with you.
BumZap Customer Testimonials
Real customer reviews of BumZap soap as read by their AI avatars
Destroy Swamp Ass
Semi-pro fisherman explains how to keep cool
Testimonials
I just zapped my butthole with BumZap. Boy is it zappy! It zings, but in a good way. And lingers! It’s not just a “do it and done”. Like I can still feel it out of the shower! Very weirdly pleasant.
Michelle, Massachusetts
I was brave and used BumZap today. I would describe it less as a zap and more of a zinging smooch. It did put a pep in my step.
Mark, California
The first time I tried BumZap, I felt like my butthole had a face and that face was smiling. I’ll never wash any other way.
